Evening

Oh before I start - my university association has gone on strike and it’s starting this coming Monday. It means that all my courses are canceled until we get enough people to vote against the strike. Next vote is on Monday, February 18 in the morning, so you can pray that things will be straightened up so we don’t lose too many weeks or even worse, have our semester canceled.

We had a Bible study tonight. There was a new person and it was quite something different to have her with us. At first she seemed to be very shy and uncomfortable, but it didn’t take long before she started taking control of the Bible study, almost preaching at us on points that she considered more important than others and would not let anybody else share. What I found quite controversial is that she was saying how, if you really have the love of God in you, you should not be weak but should be confident and not fear what people think of you, simply do what Jesus wants you to do. Then she kept on excusing herself for talking so much, “I’m sorry! It’s just the Spirit!” and “I’m sorry, but I have to let the Spirit speak.” She kept excusing the Holy Spirit for what He was doing through her. It did not make sense to me. I have no clue if she was truly filled with the Holy Spirit, but she obviously had a hard time showing respect for the people around.

I do want to be open to this kind of people and what they have to say, but I find it tough to be listening and try to understand them when they disrupt our Bible study time and when they draw so much attention on themselves, their gifts, their opinions.

I feel like I’ve been put in a boiling pot of people that are so different from me. A mixed of Evangelicals from various denominations, Catholics, this last person. I don’t feel at home, but I want to seek God’s Truth in His Word and learn how I can love these people without compromising God’s Truth. Yes, you can pay for me.

“Quiet Strength”

I was sitting in a classroom, listening to the teacher talking about some … something. I don’t know why but the topic pushed my neighbor to tease me by saying that I was insane, “I was just kidding! Actually, I think that you’re the most sane or “équilibrée” (balanced) person in our class.” We were in class so I did not ask what she meant at that time but I sent her an email about it - I was curious and wondering why she believed so. I was excited, because I believe that anything that people find different about me, is from God, it’s not from me.

She explained what she meant in an email, mentioning a few points.

1. It probably has to do with your beliefs. (But it doesn’t really matter what you believe in, anybody could come to the same sort of “understanding” you have by believing in something else than what you believe in).

2. I think it has to do with knowing who you are, where you’re going and what is important.

3. I notice the little comments you make and they make me think.

4. I think that you basically know that happiness lies in rejoicing in daily little things.

5. Perhaps the best way to sum it up would be that you seem to have this “quiet strength” that allows you to go through life without worrying too much over small details or obstacles…

Man, I really thought that her email touched very interesting points. I’m excited about it because we (as Christians) usually hope that unbelievers will notice something different about us, not so much in our personality or whatnot, but something deeper that they don’t have. I’m excited because it’ll give me an opportunity to tell her why I am that way, the hope I have, Jesus.

You can pray for her.

Under Grace

“… all of us who were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death … we know that our old self was crucified with him so that the body of sin might be done away with … you are not under law, but under grace … you also died to the law through the body of Christ …” (bits taken from Romans 6 & 7).

People under law, who break any rule of it, what do they get? They get punished. No matter what it is, when kids disobey their parents they get a spanking, when people drive too fast they either get a car accident or a speed ticket, when people kill human beings, they go to jail, etc. Well, obviously a lot of bad stuff goes on that will never be settled or even known on this earth, but basically, when you get caught doing something against the law or a set of rules that is over you, you get punished.

The beauty of being a child of God is (among many other things) this: you’re no longer under law; you’re under grace.

Every time you broke a law, every time you will go around a rule, set by human beings on earth or by God, you won’t have to be punished; you’re not under law anymore if you are in Christ Jesus. “God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, no counting men’s sins against them.” (II Corinthians 5:19). Jesus was punished in our stead. Now this is not a reason to sin. We are now slaves to righteousness (Rom. 6:1 and slaves to God’s law (Rom. 7:25). We are now pushed and want to obey God, because we belong to Him, because we are thankful, because we have the Spirit of Jesus Christ within us.

We are under grace, not under law. These two are almost opposites. Through the law we become guilty of punishment but because of Jesus, we’re now under the law of grace, where our sins are already punished and paid for by Jesus. Isn’t it a joyful thought to entertain in our hearts?

So I walked in the street and in the metro station finding myself looking at people and picturing them with a big stamp on their foreheads: “UNDER LAW” and on mine “UNDER GRACE”. If truly people could see the stamps, wouldn’t they run after all those with the “UNDER GRACE” one? Obviously.

Paradise Lost

John Milton was a Puritan and published in 1667 a book, “Paradise Lost” in which he depicts what could have happened before Genesis. This passage is about Satan discussing with his fallen angels if they want to go to war against God or not. Different demons have said different things and here is part of what Satan says, first talking about God’s power and second talking about another way to wage war against God. Remember this is fiction.

… For he, be sure,

In heighth or depth, still first and last will Reign

Sole King, and of his Kingdom loose no part

By our revolt, but over Hell extend

His Empire, and with Iron Scepter rule

Us here, as with his Golden those in Heav’n.

What (why) sit we then projecting peace and Warr?

…

… Nor shall we need

With dangerous expedition to invade

Heav’n, whose high walls fear no assault or Siege,

Or ambush from the Deep. What if we find

Some other enterprize? There is a place

(If ancient and prophetic fame in Heav’n

Err not) another World, the happy seat

Of some new Race call’d Man…

 

- John Milton, Paradise Lost -

- Chapter II lines 323 to 329 & lines 341 to 348 -

How interesting. Basically, Satan understands very well that he won’t ever be able to overpower God. So he’s looking for another way to frustrate Him. Hmmm, what about the new creatures God just made? Human beings. I don’t want to scare you, but don’t you feel prey to Satan and his demons? They can’t attack God directly so they attack the weakest of God’s creatures, us. I know this book by Milton (who was a Puritan) is fictional, but I think it depicts some truths and concepts of the spiritual world we don’t tend to think very much of in our everyday life.

“Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.”

1 Peter 5:8

Should I?

Should I write about it?

Well, something funny happened to me today. I say funny, but I felt that it was God being sarcastic with me again. Maybe He wasn’t actually, I am not exactly sure why He is leading me in a certain way and it might not be a joke at all.

Anyways you don’t understand anything so I better clear up my throat.

I go to a secular university. We have a Christian group - evangelical organization that’s on university campuses all around the globe. We are a very little group of Christian meeting together and so it’s quite easy to be in contact with the leadership and start serving the Christians at university through the organization by being part of prayer meetings, leading Bible studies, putting together bigger weekly meetings, etc.

I encourage everybody who’d be interested to come. No matter if they say they are Christians or not, believe in God or not, my so-called denomination or not. I have no problem and I love seeing people that are not evangelical participating in our meetings and Bible studies. But, I don’t think that someone who is not evangelical should be put in any position of leadership within the organization. It would not make much sense to have a literature teacher teaching you how to teach vocabulary to ESL learners. No matter how hard he tries, he’ll say stuff that just doesn’t fit.

Well I’ve been in disagreement about someone who’s been put in a leadership position within the organization, namely, the person is part of a different “branch” of Christianity that is not evangelical and with which I have a hard time because of several of their doctrines they have that have no foundation in the Bible.

The funniest thing is that I was told today that I would be leading a Bible study with this very person!

I felt like I should simply not be part of the Bible study at all and let the person lead it herself. But I realized that it was a better idea if I co-led with the person. That way I can get to know the person better and hopefully know if the person is truly born-again, who knows. Also, I’ll try to filter the person’s teachings and point of views through the Word and hopefully make sure that our Bible studies reflect God’s Word and not beliefs taught by men.

I know it’ll be good for me in some ways, it’ll be interesting, frustrating and humbling, but I’m sure I’ll learn some stuff anyways. I don’t feel like I want to do it, but I believe I really should make sure I’m co-leading.

To be sure you can pray for me!

Just Give

“If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him. If he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times comes back to you and says, ‘I repent,’ forgive him.”

Luke 17:3-4

 My view of things tells me that if the same person comes to me more than twice and asks for forgiveness, the same day, there’s a problem. I don’t know, but the person must not understand something or really, what I would think would be that the person is never really sincere about repentance. I would be the kind to judge and think that the person does not deserve my forgiveness and needs to be rebuked and shaken “Look! I’m not gonna keep closing my eyes on your sins just because Jesus tells me to forgive you. You really don’t seem to understand what repentance is, you shouldn’t need to come to me all the time, claiming repentance! Straighten your ways man.” That is not what Jesus commands me to do. And I partially know why.

It makes no sense to me to simply grant forgiveness to a guy who sins, repents, sins, repents, sins… all day long. But the truth is, I am exactly like this guy who sins and repents and sins again. I am always going to God asking for forgiveness, claiming Jesus’ blood, and I should do that more than seven times a day believe me. And God always forgives. Who am I to believe I can judge someone and refrain from forgiving, based on my own little knowledge, lack of love and so-called wisdom? Some people would probably argue that we need to discern and judge between spirits, which is true, but about forgiveness, Jesus says, you ought to forgive the repentant soul, no matter how many times he comes to you, no matter how true the repentance looks like, you are not in a position to judge of it and you yourself need to be forgiven every day.

This is probably common knowledge to you. I hope so. I’m just learning to be humble and let Christ be Christ in me.

Academic Stretching

It’s now been four weeks that I’ve been in my internship and there is still two weeks to go (hey and I’m going to BC in a little more than two weeks too!) and the best word to describe my time is “stretching”.

In the 211 (bus) this morning I was listening to Timothy Keller on my ipod (thanks to my family for this wonderful birthday present!) and he was speaking on how to change. At one point he talked about the fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22-23) and how sometimes, it is easy for people to think they’re growing and becoming more like Jesus because they do so much in the church. For some people who are stronger in the faith, to help and teach the weaker ones, makes them feel as if they themselves are fine and growing because the weaker ones are transformed by the stronger ones’ input in their lives: the weaker ones are becoming more loving, more patient, etc. through the stronger ones’ ministry.

Keller continues by saying that when people grow through your ministry, it does not necessarily mean that you are growing yourself. The fact that people become more like Jesus through your input is not one of the fruit of the Spirit.

Here end Keller’s thoughts, those are mine:

I think it’s very good that people can help weaker ones to grow and become more like Jesus. But let’s not confuse service and growth. Growth can and should be accomplish through service, but sometimes it does not work that way, depending on our heart’s conditions.

I have found myself going through tough times -not spiritually, but academically. I feel like I have the best cooperating teacher in my internship, but she has very high standards, so high that I wouldn’t be surprised that she would fail me. I don’t worry, that’s for sure. It is interesting how I’ve been feeling in spite of the stretch, frustration and concerns I’ve had about my planning for this internship. I often feel inadequate and I am everyday humbled by my cooperating teacher. She stretches and humbles me so much. Yes it is tough to go through this internship and I never feel like talking about my planning to my CT because I know that again my pride will be crushed and I’ll be reminded I can’t do anything that doesn’t need my CT’s input and changes. But, even though it is tough, I find myself rejoicing and embracing this time in my life. No, I don’t like it. But man, I’m learning! It’s like purposely holding a rose tight in my hand, feeling the thorns getting into my skin. But I still hold on to it.

All of this just to write a long post. No. Listening to Keller this morning helped me realize how important it is to have people who will stretch us spiritually. I’m stretched academically right now and I see how valuable it is. Being stretched spiritually, that is what will help us truly grow and become true disciples of Jesus Christ. It is not enough to think that because we’re serving and people are growing through us, we’re doing good. We need mentors and people that will stretch us. I would like to rejoice in spiritual stretching just as much as academic stretching.

Pray for me.

Psalm 127:1-2

“Unless the Lord builds the house, its builders labor in vain.

Unless the Lord watches over the city, the watchmen stand guard in vain.

In vain you rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat

for He grants sleep to those He loves.”

 

So it is right to labor and stand guard, to rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat - when the Lord is building and working for us. It is also right to rest because the Lord grants sleep to those He loves - He takes care of those He loves while they sleep, they need not to worry about toiling for their food. Sounds a lot like the sabbath to me. I believe it is important to sit back every once in a while and reflect on this verse and our lives: Is God building the house or am I toiling with my own efforts without Him?

Teacher

It seems that there is always something that calls me back to praying for a certain teacher. You remember that I often wrote about a university teacher last year and how the teacher seemed to use a lot of Christian words and expressions but the teacher’s way of speaking about God-believers always frustrated me? (PS: it is hard to make up sentences without using he or she).

Well I was looking through a book the teacher wrote and gave us as something we had to read during this semester. Each chapter had a small quote by its title and the last chapter’s quote got my attention.

“Seeing many thing, but thou observest not.” Isaiah 40:20

The verse went quite well with the title of the chapter. I had a hard time actually believing that I was reading a Bible verse there, so I looked it up in my Bible, only to find out that Isaiah 40:20 was:

“A man too poor to present such an offering selects wood that will not rot. He looks for a skilled craftsman to set up an idol that will not topple.”

Finally I realized that my teacher’s quote was from Isaiah 42:20. I felt like I should let the teacher know about it, even though the vast majority of people probably hadn’t noticed a thing. So I sent the teacher an email. I pray that this will open up in a conversation about the Bible, who knows.

 

Yes, again there is something that keeps me praying about this teacher. Oh and by the way, I should be in a school somewhere, but I still have no news from the internship man and I can’t get a hold of him. I don’t worry, this is frustrating that’s all.

 

#109 dans Sur les Ailles de la Foi.

I was at a prayer meeting last Wednesday and it was held in a church nearby. Once a month the two small evangelical churches that are on the same street in Verdun do a prayer meeting together. So I was sitting there and noticed that they used a different type of hymn book. In French we have the “Célébrons Dieu” (Praise/Celebrate? God) that is probably considered the equal of the English Hymnal or Hymn Book and there is one that is even older than the Célébrons Dieu, it is called, “Sur les Ailles de la Foi” (On the Wings of Faith). I opened the Sur les Ailles de la Foi that was in front of me and started to skim and scan the pages. Some songs were written in the 1500s! I love old prayers and songs, they often are more profound then today’s songs (often, not all the time…).

So yesterday I got a birthday present from my roommates. Guess what I got? A Sur les Ailles de la Foi! I found a song that sounded familiar (well, the words) and figure out that there was a French version of the “Wonderful Cross”! I have found the words quite good in French, especially the third verse, here’s the literal French to English translation:

Have we ever seen a love so great, (Vit-on jamais un amour si grand)

unite to hurt so extreme (s’unir à douleur plus extrême)

And the thorn, on the brow of a dying, (Et l’épine, au front d’un mourant)

shine like a diadem? (Resplendir comme un diadème?)

The English says pretty much the same thing (See from his head, his hands, his feet, sorrow and love flow mingle down, did ever such love and sorrow meet or thorns compose so rich a crown) but it feels as if it sounds worse and then outrageously glorious to me in the light of the comparison that’s done in French because of the word “mourant” (dying) that is not there in the English, and then the words thorns shining like a diadem. The English conveys the same wonder and glory, but it just hit me even more in an old, French version.