Tonight was the opening night of the GBU (Groupe Biblique Universitaire - you can figure what it means I’m sure). Lots of new faces and a couple of known ones. We were about twenty people. There are more Christians than that in the university for sure, but it is still a very small number when we think of the … 30, 35, thousand other students going to my university.
These last weeks I have been feeling a bit different. Yes university started and life is busy and etc. but I’ve been thinking about obedience to God. It frustrates me everyday to find myself failing to obey the Holy Spirit and just do things my way because it’s easier, because sin tastes better (for the moment). It is still frustrating and I feel powerless. I feel that it shouldn’t be that way.
The last song we sang at the GBU meeting was the French version of “Arms of Love”. We had sang about God’s holiness and loving eachother and I myself had a good time praising my Lord. But with my heart frustrated because of sin and struggles and lack of understanding, I felt that I couldn’t sing those words:
My heart is glad that you’ve called me your own
And there’s no place I’d rather be
Than in your arms of love, in your arms of love
Holding me still, holding me near, in your arms of love
In French, the last verse literally says something like “Holding me very tight, holding me very tight”. I was picturing myself in the arms of Jesus, being hugged very tight, like, very tight. Why would Jesus want to embrace me? I must be so frustrating to Him with my repeated sins and empty words. I am a sinner, I am helpless, why would He want to hug and love me? After the song, we could pick up a bible verse from a bunch of little cards. I picked Matthew 28:20 and that said in French, “I am with you for ever”. That struck me. He wanted to be with me and care for me.
In my struggle for holiness, I had forgotten I was helpless. Well, I knew it, but I was still struggling with my own strength, in my own way. I had forgotten how Jesus loved me and wanted me to lay my burdens at His feet and put His yoke on my shoulders so we can walk together. I’m not exactly sure how to do that, but I want to remind myself that Jesus is by my side, waiting for me to give up and accept His yoke. What is His yoke?
3 Comments
“This is the covenant that I will make with them after those days, says the Lord: I will put my laws on their hearts and I will write them on their minds, I will never again remember their sins and their lawless acts”. NOW WHERE THERE IS FORGIVENESS OF THESE, THERE IS NO LONGER AN OFFERING FOR SIN.” Heb. 10:16-18
God does not expect us to be perfect, he expects us to abide in Christ….
Ray
And on the top of it all, He’s not just with you, he is completely covering you with His Holy blood. Reming yourself of the position or the image your are for him. He doesn’t see your sinful nature anymore, he only sees Jesus, covering you. Avant d’être baptisée, j’ai fait le cours de maitre et son diciple avec Papa. Et l’image qu’il m’a montrer est qu’on est tous un vieux butch de cigarette qui pu, et au moment du salut, une tasse à l’envers, vient nous couvrir (Jésus) Et tout ce qu’on voit maintenant, c’est la tasse, la vielle odeur de cigarette, ou la butch elle-même est là (notre nature pécheresse) mais tout ce qu’on voit (ce que DIeu voit) c’est la tasse (Jésus, son sang)
Une vérité à te souvenir ces jours-ci.
(merci P’pa)
All of this is true.
But what bugs me is the fact that I always fall into the same sins and that I deliberately choose to disobey God’s Spirit. I am worse than the Israelites in the Bible.
It’s not the truth that God forgives and clothes me with Jesus that I can’t believe. It’s the truth that Gabrielle keeps sinning in the face of the Holy Spirit, willfully disobeying, that’s what I find unbelievable. This is not right and should not be like that.
Post a Comment